Breathing the Heights and Depths

Breathing down to the depths and up to the heights. The pause after the exhale is the calm bottom of the ocean, and the pause after the inhale is the energy of the steepest climb. 

When I want to feel a certain way I follow my breath. I never want to forget about breathing, though in my dreams I forget. As a child I had a recurring dream of being able to breathe underwater and still now, I daydream of this ability. To be able to breathe everywhere, now that is a dream. To be able to breathe with ease at the highest elevations and at the bottom of the ocean. Breath is life and I want to breathe everywhere, on and on, forever. 

Life is so varied. There are gradations too numerous to count. Often we spend our time scurrying about the middle ground. Sometimes we run up and sometimes we sink down. When we are down it's usually different than it was the time before. There are treasures in the depths and paucity at the heights, and it's hard to know which is which, sometimes. 

We think people are running with us or sinking with us, but mostly we're middling along with people and when we go for the extremes it's alone. Once or twice or a few times we want to grab the wrist of someone in the middle and take them with us on a jaunt. 

Let's go, you and me. 

Dante's Peak, NBC News

Meditation as Self-Care

The verb meditate can refer to a variety of mental activities. Here's a Merriam-Webster dictionary entry:

1

: to engage in contemplation or reflection 

• He meditated long and hard before announcing his decision.

: to engage in mental exercise (such as concentration on one's breathing or repetition of a mantra) for the purpose of reaching a heightened level of spiritual awareness

transitive verb

1: to focus one's thoughts on : reflect on or ponder over 

• He was meditating his past achievements.

2: to plan or project in the mind : intend, purpose 

• He was meditating revenge.

—

meditator

 play \-ˌtā-tər\ noun

Within a spiritual context, there are many forms of meditation to practice. I am not an adherent of any particular form of meditation or yoga, so I did not follow the advice of my first teachers who told me to "dig one deep well" and drink only from it. I am not particularly religious about my own meditation; admittedly, I use it for health and healing, and as a complement to prayer which is the spiritual side of my own practice.

When working with clients who are new to meditation, I like to present it as caring for and attending to the self (or Self, if you prefer).

Our attention is frequently externally directed in our day-to-day existence. Meditation is a purposeful direction of our attention within, or to a specific point of focus, depending on the goals and situation of the individual.

Meditation can be part of a self-care routine. From middle childhood and beyond, we all need to practice self-care. Infants and toddlers generally have all of their physical and psychological needs met by caregivers, including soothing and comforting. As we become more independent, our ability to self-soothe and self-regulate becomes critical. An example of an early self-care practice is choosing to sleep with a favorite blanket and cuddle with a well-loved stuffed animal. This example involves anticipation of one's own needs and concrete actions to fulfill them without outside help. In adulthood, the needs and actions may be different, but the principles are the same.

Self-care can be quite simple. Taking a five minute break at work with a hot cup of tea is an act of self-care. Lying down on the couch and listening to a favorite song after a stressful experience is also self-care in action. Of course, self-care can be more elaborate and disciplined using modalities such as massage, tapping or restorative yoga. Meditation, among its other attributes, is an example of paying attention to and caring deeply for ourselves.

When we meditate, we give ourselves permission to relax into the moment, but we don't lose awareness or doze off. Instead, we turn our greatest power, our attention, within. We leave the proverbial lights on inside, rather than shining them outwards. When practiced in a certain way, meditation can feel like being held by strong and protective arms. It can feel like coming home to onself in the light of awareness. 

Like any new self-care practice, it takes some time to get comfortable with meditation. How long it takes to adjust and feel really good about it will all depend on the practitioner, but it's best to start with only a few minutes and then build up. When you don't want the timer to buzz and wish you could sit for longer, you know you are making fantastic progress. Sometimes you're just tired, so any form of rest feels good, but meditation is not exactly rest because of the refining of your attention. Some days it can feel like awakened bliss, other days it can feel flat, and other days you may gain flashes of insight.

As with any self-care practice, be kind to yourself when you meditate and on days when you are fatigued, sitting awake with closed eyes (or an internal gaze) and resting is the entire point of meditating. Other days, you may feel more like tuning into your sensations and emotions and listening.

As we progress with meditation, our relationship to ourself is greatly enhanced, which can only mean good things for us.

If you would like some help or guidance beginning a self-care oriented meditation practice, contact me through this blog or through my website.

Stock photo